Reflection on April | Good things happened.


Reflection on April | Good things happened. 

Reflection, sometimes it's good and sometimes it's bad. 

And today I'm beaming to announce that this is a good reflection post. I shared on TWITTER last week how I'd made some changes to my life this month and everyone was excited to hear all about it! I wish this was a helpful post filled with hints and tips for someone who's struggling to do the same but unfortunately it's not. Truth be told it's not been easy going but it's also not been as frightening as I first imagined, so rather than a condescending post telling you how to change your life...I'm just going to bore you with minor changes I've made to mine. 

I think this is something I forgot to add in my tweet; these are minor changes. Over time they'll add to a much bigger and bolder change but for now, simple and small changes are making the biggest difference to my lifestyle. And guess what, I'M HAPPY! And personally for me thats the best thing about all this. This year has been an emotional rollercoaster and I'm sure it'll continue to be but when I think about how much I've developed as a person throughout one month alone, I can't help but smile and be excited to see what else I can achieve. 

Quick question, does it still count as [conquering] if I''ve not yet travelled anywhere? But I'm excited again, I've actually got a whole post dedicated to this but let me explain the basics - since my last holiday in 2015 I've struggled with the idea of going away, I dipped my toes into it with a weekend trip to Wales w/ my friends earlier this year, which scared the life out of me but I really did enjoy. And since my brother has moved to Australia, we've been planning to visit him later in the year. Trust me, I know that it's a huge leap from Wales to AUS but we're not going just yet so I'm trying to plan a smaller trip to conquer said fears beforehand, so any fun/beautiful/quirky holiday locations, keep me posted. 

Two lessons down and I can say I'm well and truly conquering this fear. There's been many ups and downs over the years over my lack of interest with driving, after previous lessons in which to be put simply; I learnt fuck all and have endured terrible nightmares over the years and I'd lost all confidence to find a way behind the wheel. After making a deal with my parents I thought it was time to stop avoiding the issue. I booked with the instructor my brother passed with, so having that familiarity helped me feel a little more comfortable with this. 

I've been saving my money for quite some time now but this month I've had a few reasons to actually put that money aside. Working on a monthly pay check and the occasional times I made some money through blogging, I've started putting that away little by little. I've started making lunches for work instead of eating Costa on every break time, I've not treated myself to much (if anything this month actually) and I've just been trying to keep an eye on what I'm spending. With us wanting to head on a few holidays this year I've got a hell of a lot of saving to do for that and I want to start saving to move out, so I've been keeping check of my finances throughout April/May. 

Easier said than done right? This is one I've struggled with the most, I spend a lot of my time trying to analyse every thought process and situation I'm in (personally, I think it's the Counselling graduate in me...) However I've gotten to this point in my thought process where I've noticed I'm getting stressed by the scenarios I've made in my head; situations that haven't happened and some so exaggerated, they aren't going to happen. It's taking some time and I've not mastered this yet, but I'm taking the time to realise the thought process, taking a step back to assess the situation and calmly remind myself that it's probably not true. I'm also taking an approach with the closest people in my life and talking it through with them, thankfully I've got the biggest support in my boyfriend who's getting the brunt of this and helps takes that stress away, everyday. 

Whilst writing this post I remembered something I'd studied during University and something I used as a technique when I was going to CBT counselling sessions. Luckily I find writing quite calming anyway but my counsellor would encourage me to write down my problems, take note of everything that was stressing me out or causing my anxiety and introduced me to THE WORRY TREE where I'd break down my situation and either change my focus or to remind myself that I've potentially exaggerated the problem. This works nicely for Mental Health Awareness Week - something I've not really opened up about before, but if you're ever struggling please don't hesitate to send me a message on TWITTER, I love a good chat. 

And when I say this I mean all relationships in general. I'm quite the introvert at times and snuggle into my own little bubble, especially when I'm feeling at my lowest. But I'm trying to be open with people, talk more and to share how I'm feeling with people. I have some fabulous friendships, I've got some of the most supportive people in my life and I don't think I thank them enough and they've all been a massive support system for me the last couple of months. Personally I'm trying not to be as introvert, message people more often, check in and make more plans. I've made more plans with my oldest friends and all my closest friends, booking more time off from work to arrange time together and also making sure I find as much time as possible with my boyfriend, Tom - whom I chat about in my MONTHLY MOVIES: APRIL post. 

There's a couple others thing thats quite personal to me that I won't be sharing on my blog but something I'm very proud of and I guess with that, this list is smaller than I originally intended. When having discussions with Tom about my growth and my friends giving me little pep talks I've realised the difference in my personality but when trying to write it down - it doesn't feel like a whole lot (but it's HUGE to me). Honestly even the smallest of changes can make the world of difference, personally I've had a reality check throughout April and it's really helped me with this breakthrough. 

I still struggle from time to time, I'm still having mental health days when I'm feeling low but just that reminder of how far I've come in just a little over a month is SO liberating! 

Post a Comment

Thanks for commenting, I reply as soon as I can. Feel free to tweet me @seethestarsblog - for a quicker response.

Sarahlaublogs © . Design by Berenica Designs.